


begging the dawn not to come

by newct127



Category: EXO (Band), NCT (Band), SuperM (Korea Band), WAYV
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bathroom Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Moon Taeil, Deepthroating, Falling In Love, Hand Jobs, I'm Sorry, Kissing, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Making Out, Masturbation, Masturbation in Bathroom, Mutual Masturbation, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Not beta'd we die like men, Pining, Porn with Feelings, Riding, Rimming, Semi-Public Sex, Slice of Life, Smut, mother trucker dude that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:53:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24369895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newct127/pseuds/newct127
Summary: They meet in a nightclub. They get to know each other in the restroom. And Hyuck would love to know him for the rest of his life, but as he learns, with Taeil that’s not exactly an easy thing to do.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Kim Jungwoo/Moon Taeil, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Moon Taeil, Lee Taeyong/Suh Youngho | Johnny, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 135





	begging the dawn not to come

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first attempt at writing smut in years. the first and last time i wrote smut i was fourteen and if lavyrle spencer had read it she’d sue me for plagiarism. everything about this fic is kind of out of my fic writing comfort zone, not only did i make it difficult for myself by writing smut, but i also added a pet, cause just smut wasn’t difficult enough. i can only hope i don’t disappoint.  
> i really want to write the chaos that ten/baek would be, so i included it in here and didn’t expand as much as i wanted… oh well, maybe in the future.
> 
> the title comes from howl by laura marling, because it fit perfectly, and also because i like puns and this was going to feature a dog before i changed my mind
> 
> please take the explicit warning seriously. enjoy.

Donghyuck isn’t sure at what exact moment his life became pathetic. He’d say around the time he was in his teens, just to be safe, but who really knows. All he knows is that it’s Friday night and he’s at a club, which is cool when you say it like that. It’s not at all cool when you also mention the way he got to the club, which wasn’t voluntarily per say. He was dragged there by his best friend, who was dragged there by his brother. Not cool whatsoever. Very much pathetic.

Clubs and bars are not his scene. He’s more of the type that stays at home and plays video games all night. He only makes the exception because Mark is practically begging, but also because Mark’s brother Baekhyun is technically Hyuck’s boss, and he doesn’t want to say no to his boss when he puts whatever idea he has in his ‘strongly recommend’ work voice. He recognizes the voice immediately cause he hears it more often than he should.

Hyuck works on the graphic design team at a huge marketing company, and Baekhyun is the team manager. He might not have much clue about graphic design, but he does know how to rally all the nerds that do, and he actually answers for them to higher management, so they don’t have to deal with any of the bureaucracy. Donghyuck appreciates it, but also does not want to piss him off in any way cause Baekhyun is also in charge of assigning the projects. It’s actually kind of important not to do anything that will do the opposite of show how appreciative Hyuck is for all his hard work, cause so far, he’s been getting all the good projects. Thank you, nepotism, you fine piece of ass.

The nights spent out in crowded areas with the guys aren’t exactly his cup of tea, Hyuck actually kind of hates those nights, and because the only thing he hates even more than going out to crowded places is feeling miserable, he starts developing coping mechanisms. Said mechanisms are mostly games he plays with himself in his head, like counting how many people are wearing sweaters, or a certain color, or how many times can he check his phone before Baekhyun’s boyfriend Ten scolds him and tells him to enjoy the night cause he’s only young once. Once that happens, the game turns into counting how many vodka red bulls he can drink before his blood pressure is high enough that he can hear his own heartbeat in his ears. Just regular, fun stuff. Exactly what everyone else is doing in their twenties, right?

It wasn’t always this way. Hyuck used to be a by the book extrovert that only came home for a change of clothes and a shower, and spent every possible moment off somewhere, doing something. If he wasn’t at work, he was on some adventure, running on adrenaline and positive thinking. But as relationships fell apart Hyuck couldn’t help but focus on the mistakes he made, and how it was always him who was more invested, and it started eating him up.

Life got to him, slowly, chipping away at his personality until all that was left was a shell of himself. No longer adventurous, no longer trusting. No longer positive. Now he focuses on not ending up hurt.

It has been a year since the last time Hyuck let himself fall in love and lose himself in the feeling. It gets lonely sometimes, sure, but he’d rather have lonely than heartbroken. There is a cure for loneliness, there isn’t one for heartbreak.

But change is in the air. He can feel it. He’s ready for it. Whatever it may be.

* * *

It used to be just one Friday a month, but then it grew to two, and now it’s every Friday, and Hyuck is feeling like he’s just wasting time. Especially since all he actually does is sit around and drink and count colors. He’s not turning any tables around any time soon. The atmosphere is heavy tonight, but he cannot distinguish whether change is anywhere in the mix of perfume, alcohol and sweat.

This time around Hyuck is counting button ups, and Ten notices him being in his own world, so he does his usual.

“I’m gonna get another round. Hyuckie, come help me with it,” he prompts, knowing that Hyuck won’t say no, cause let’s face it, what else is he going to do?

“Sure.”

Ten just does that now. He invites Donghyuck everywhere, and he includes him in things, no matter how big or tiny. And it’s not like he minds, it gives him something to do for a few minutes, an afternoon, or an evening, but it gets too much for him. Ten means well, they all do. They really want him to go back to the normal he once had, but Hyuck isn’t feeling that. It’ll happen when it happens. It’s not something that he can just force. Sure, Hyuck needs to get out of this cocoon he’s built around himself, but he can’t do it just because someone else wants him to. He has to do it on his own.

There are no words exchanged between him and Ten. It seems as though Ten is giving up on trying to get him to open up any more, and Hyuck is really grateful for it. He has another reason for being grateful too. Ten getting him to keep him company gives Hyuck a better view of the rest of the crowd, and he can count more of the button ups. But also because that’s when he spots an blood orange haired dude that’s just arriving with a group of people, and Hyuck is intrigued. Anyone who has the confidence to wear that outside of the house is automatically Hyuck’s type.

He eyes him for about an hour, mapping his movements around the club. That’s the amount of time it takes him to build up the courage to talk to the guy, and potentially flirt. The first guy he’s flirted with in months.

The opportunity presents itself when the guy goes to the bar alone, and to the surprise of his friends, Hyuck gets up and takes that shot.

“Hey,” Hyuck says, and he gives the dude a smile.

“Hi,” the guy returns. He doesn’t even look at Hyuck though, and Hyuck realizes, he’ll have to try a bit harder than he initially thought. He just needs to break the ice first.

“Can I buy you a drink?”

“I already bought myself a drink.”

The guy keeps staring ahead, waiting for the bartender to finish making the drinks.

Shit. How does he even come back from that? Okay, try something else.

“What’s your name?”

The question prompts the guy to finally look at him. He smiles, eyes him from head to toe, and as soon as he parts his lips to answer, the bartender interrupts with the drink.

Sometimes, bartenders make such great cock blockers.

The guy accepts the tray of beer bottles, shots and cocktails, and looks at Hyuck again. He balances the tray as he leans closer to Hyuck’s ear and makes a suggestion that Hyuck just knows he cannot pass up on.

“Meet me in the restroom in half an hour. I’ll tell you my name there.”

The stranger walks away and Hyuck tries to swallow the lump that forms in his throat. Just the suggestion is on the brink of short circuiting his brain. But the real thing? Holy fucking shit.

* * *

The last thing Hyuck thought would happen tonight was that he was going to meet someone. But look at him now, not only did he meet someone, he’s making out with the dude in a bathroom stall.

He still doesn’t know his name. What he does know is that the guy is really passionate, and he lets out the most beautiful noises Hyuck has ever heard. And they have yet to do anything more than kiss.

The guy’s lips are perfectly soft, and the way he kisses sends shivers down Hyuck’s spine. His kisses are deep and hungry, and every time he pulls him closer to himself, the guy moans into his mouth, and the sound goes straight to Hyuck’s cock. He lightly bites the guy’s bottom lip until his breath hitches, and he grinds his body against Hyuck’s. That motion let’s Hyuck know that the stranger is as excited and hard as him.

Their lips separate, and now it’s Hyuck’s turn to be loud because the guy is leaving a trail of kisses on his neck, perfect little pecks that make sure all of his nerves are wide awake. He’s wide awake too. He can no longer feel the numbness from the alcohol. All he feels now is the warmth that the stranger is emitting, he gives into how good all of it feels and he almost forgets what they’re here for. Luckily, the guy remembers, he seems to know what he’s doing more than Hyuck does.

The guy pulls away, but only so he can see what he’s doing in the dimness of the restroom light. Then he goes straight for Hyuck’s belt and zipper, undoing them so quickly with masterful movements. Hyuck wonders for a moment if this guy has done this before. Is that why he seems so confident?

The guy gives him a nudge towards the stall door and he sinks to his knees. Hyuck’s brain almost explodes just at the thought. He then looks up at him with a question on his face and all Hyuck can do is frantically nod permission.

“I’m still gonna need your words, sweetheart.”

“Yes.”

It’s only then that the stranger hooks his fingers on the elastic band. He’s careful as he pushes down Hyuck’s underwear, and he licks his hand before he touches him. He wraps his fingers around Hyuck’s length, and he moves slowly at first, testing the waters before he licks his lips and starts teasing the head with his tongue. Moments after he starts sucking and swirling his tongue around the head, the stranger hollows out his cheeks and goes further with the same slow pace, taking more of him with every bob of the head. He holds himself together pretty well, he thinks, but he can’t look away. Both of the stranger’s hands then travel to Hyuck’s hips, and he holds him still as he works on taking all of him. He shows no signs of a gag reflex as he deep throats him, looking up at Hyuck for some eye contact that this time lingers. Seeing that alone is enough for Donghyuck to start losing control, and the warm breath that’s tickling his skin every time the stranger swallows around him is of no help.

On instinct, Hyuck’s own hands end up in the stranger’s hair, pulling slightly at it. At each pull the stranger can’t help but moan, and the vibrations travel from the back of his throat through Hyuck’s body. He sees stars at that, and when it gets too much he slams his head back into the stall door just to stop himself from fucking into the stranger’s mouth. The guy realizes what’s happening, and he starts making noise on purpose.

“Holy fuck,” Hyuck whispers. It all feels so good. So much better than what he remembers it feeling.

The guy pulls off for a break, taking deep breaths while he works one hand around him, using the other to play with his balls. He’d love it if all the attention remained on him, but he wants to return the favor, and make the stranger feel as good as he does. He grasps the guy’s chin and tilts his head up so their eyes meet.

“This isn’t just about me, baby. I want to make you feel good too. Tell me what you want.”

The answer he receives is quite simple.

“Touch me.”

Hyuck doesn’t have to be told twice. As soon as the guy stands up Hyuck goes for it, unzipping his jeans, then licking his hand and wrapping it around him. He starts at the head, working the oozing precome down his erection, and he can feel the effect that contact has on the man in front of him. The stranger keeps stroking him the entire time, and when Hyuck begins reciprocating he matches his pace.

They’re stuck in their on world of pleasure, producing wanton sounds that get somewhat drowned out by the club music. With eyes closed Hyuck places his free hand on the nape of the guy’s neck, and he pulls him towards him until they’re touching their foreheads and breathing each other’s air. Their breaths and panting are in the same rhythm as each of them works on bringing the other closer to orgasm. Hyuck opens his eyes for a moment, he’s lost in it, but he really wants to see the stranger, he wants to see whether what he’s doing is working or not. The sight he sees only excites him more, the stranger has his eyes shut, his nose scrunched up uncomfortably. That signals Hyuck that he’s close. And that image only brings Hyuck closer.

His vision goes black as he comes, and he ends up leaning back into the door in attempt to find some balance. The stranger comes moments after, cursing and groaning as he places his forehead on Hyuck’s shoulder. They’re both panting, trying to catch their breaths as the shock waves pulsate through them. As they both calm down from it the stranger plants another hungry kiss on Hyuck’s lips.

Hyuck ends the kiss, pulling away as he realizes that his burning question hasn’t been answered yet.

“What’s your name?”

“Taeil. What’s yours?”

“Donghyuck.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

* * *

The previous time Hyuck had sex with anyone it was with his ex and it was an embarrassing amount of time ago. So it’s no wonder that he spends the weekend lounging around the house, feeling much more relaxed than usual, because all the tension he used to feel is gone. It’s weird. Jerking off by himself helps release some of it, but being jerked off by a handsome stranger it like ten times better.

He cleans up the apartment, cooks for himself for the first time in maybe a month, and does some grooming, some skin care. By Monday morning he feels like a new, better version of himself. He feels ready to move on with his life.

“You did what on Friday?”

If he’s being honest, it’s an absolute misuse of company time. Baekhyun called him to his office as soon as Hyuck stepped foot in the building, but the topic at hand is private matters. A huge no. But on the other hand, Hyuck shouldn’t have let it slip to Mark that he did more than just chat up the hot stranger, so he kind of asked for this. Ever since his college days, when he met Mark, and long before they worked at the same company, Baekhyun has assumed his role as an older brother to Hyuck. And while most of the time that older brother role consisted of him buying them drinks and letting them try pot under supervision, sometimes this happened too. Serious conversations about things Hyuck has done, whether smart or stupid. It’s the only downside.

“I had sex in a public restroom,” Hyuck says. Of course he admits it right away, he has no reason to hide it. Baekhyun already knows what happened, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have called Hyuck in.

“With a fuckboy,” Baekhyun says with disappointment in his voice.

“It was a one night stand.”

“I thought the entire point of your new attitude was to avoid fuckboys, Hyuck. You get in your head about it and they do nothing but hurt you. And one night stands aren’t a thing with you, you always get attached.”

Okay, yeah. Maybe Baek has a good reason for freaking out here, what he just described fits pretty well with the pattern that Hyuck has developed over the years. But at the same time, what he’s describing is so far off what’s going on right now.

“I’m not in my head about this dude, cause all I know about him is his name. I don’t have enough information to build a relationship with him in my head.”

“I just don’t want you to get hurt again, Hyuck. None of us do. We were so happy that you were in a flirty mood with that dude, we thought you were putting yourself out again, but it was never supposed to end like that.”

“It was just a good time. Actually, it was more of an excellent time. But that’s about it. I’m never gonna see him again anyway.”

When he says that Donghyuck really believes that it’s true. Baekhyun believes him too.

Fate, however, has some other ideas.

* * *

Another Friday, another night out. A different club though, one they haven’t been to before, so it has that going for itself. The extrovert in him is enjoying this, exploring new spaces. His friends have some other ideas about how the night is going to go, though. They’re still hanging onto what happened the week prior.

“Who is Hyuck going to fuck in the restroom tonight… let’s see,” Ten says, and he starts looking around the space.

“Not funny. It was a onetime thing,” he defends himself.

But what Hyuck doesn’t know yet, is that it’s not a onetime thing.

The conversation runs for way too long, and Hyuck gets kind of lost in it. They’re dissecting his dating history at the moment, and he’s absolutely enjoying it, cause who wouldn’t want all their dirty laundry set on the same drying line, for everyone to see. They’re somewhere in the middle of listing all the different reasons why his last relationship fell through when he sees the head of blood orange hair that he was pulling on just a week prior.

The fucking coincidence.

“Hold the fuck up,” Hyuck says, “Are you guys seeing what I’m seeing?”

They all follow Donghyuck’s eyes and see what he sees.

“Holy fucking shit,” Ten says, mimicking Hyuck’s voice, “Go,” he then orders.

“That’s not a great idea,” Mark says, and Donghyuck rolls his eyes at him.

“Let the kid do whatever he wants,” Ten defends him. For the first time in his life, Hyuck and Ten agree on something.

And the kid does exactly that. Hyuck gets up and he elbows his way through the crowd all the way to the bar, catching Taeil just in time.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you followed me here,” he says, using his most seductive voice. Taeil looks at him and immediately smiles.

“Maybe I really enjoyed myself last time, so I did.”

“Did you?” he knows the answer before he even asks the question, but the flirtation is headed in that direction, and he doesn’t want to miss out on the opportunity.

“I didn’t. But I’m happy to see you. We can go for another round if you’re still here in an hour,” Taeil sounds like he’s smiling when he says it, and Hyuck melts. He cannot believe his luck.

“We should do that.”

Taeil smiles as he walks away, and Hyuck feels his heart flutter at the smile. He makes a mental note that he shouldn’t mention that to anyone, especially because of how his friends reacted the previous time.

* * *

Once again Hyuck finds himself in a bathroom stall with Taeil. His lips are as soft as the previous time, and he tastes just like Hyuck remembers. Not that he remembered or thought about that. He did though, more than once.

Taeil’s kissing hungrily again, his hands on Hyuck’s hips, and it takes his breath away. Hyuck is running his up and down Taeil’s back, ravishing in the fact that they’re here again. Their bodies are glued together and they can both feel how hard the other is even through all the layers. Taeil lets go for a moment and digs into his back pocket. He takes something out and maneuvers his hand in such a way that he can hand it to Hyuck.

In surprise, Hyuck separates his lips from Taeil’s so he can ask.

“You brought a condom?”

“I came prepared in case the stars aligned and I saw you again,” Taeil says. Then he digs into his pocket again.

“How prepared exactly?” Hyuck queries, and is taken aback again when Taeil shows him, “You brought lube with you.”

It’s not a question. That’s exactly what Taeil has done. A tiny, travel size bottle of lube. He’s finished. Screw everything his friends might say. He wants this as many times as he can possibly get it.

“I want you to fuck me,” he then says, and Hyuck gulps cause he has no idea what else to do to contain his excitement. He’s already leaking, and he hasn’t been even touched yet.

He cups Taeil’s cheeks, comprehending that he just heard and he pulls him in for a kiss. Taeil takes lead again, working on unzipping Hyuck’s pants, and then his own. Hyuck has to pull away from the kiss to avoid biting down on Taeil’s bottom lip too hard as Taeil unintentionally brushes his hand against his cock over the fabric.

“Fuck.”

“You’re very eager today.”

“Well, excuse me. I’ve had an hour and this is all I’ve been thinking about.”

“You’re so fucking cute Hyuckie,” Taeil says.

He slips his hand into Hyuck’s underpants and Hyuck moans in response. This restroom is much more crowded than the one in the other club, so he bites down his lower lip, hoping it will muffle out some of the sounds that he makes. Taeil pumps a few times, then takes his hand away. He turns around, his back towards Hyuck and starts taking his own bottoms off, all while Hyuck starts a small rip on the condom wrapper, making it easier for him to open it later, when his fingers are slick with lube.

That’s the next thing he does. He cracks open the little bottle of lube and squirts some onto his pointer and middle finger. Taeil’s waiting for it, he’s already leaned down, propping himself up with both hands placed on the toilet tank, legs spread enough so Hyuck can have easy access.

He starts with just his index finger, spreading the lube around the rim first, then inside to the best of his abilities. As Hyuck pushes all the way in, his finger sliding in with ease, Taeil releases a sharp breath at the sensation. Hyuck places his other hand on the small of his back, then adds a second finger and begins stretching him. The feeling of Taeil tightening around his fingers has Hyuck’s breath hitching. The effect he has on him, the fact that he’ll be inside him in a few minutes is getting a bit too much.

By the time he adds a third finger Hyuck’s ego is at an all time high, and it’s only getting higher with every sound Taeil makes. Hyuck crooks his fingers, and starts brushing against his prostate, and Taeil tightens again.

“Get in me,” Taeil pleads, his words both preceded and succeeded by groans. Hyuck pulls his fingers out, and Taeil whines. Hyuck can’t help but chuckle at it.

“And you said I was eager,” Hyuck teases. He unwraps the condom and rolls it on himself, then lines up his cock with Taeil’s entrance.

He pushes in slowly, intending to be as gentle as he can be, hands on Taeil’s hips intending to soften his speed. What he doesn’t plan for is that Taeil is pushing back, trying to speed up the process. Hyuck is mesmerized by the tightness and th heat, by the sight of his cock completely disappearing inside Taeil, and by the groan escaping Taeil’s throat. It’s all overwhelming, so much so, that he needs a moment before he can even begin moving. He presses his body against his back, wrapping both arms around him, calming himself down so he doesn’t come right away.

“You can move, baby.”

“I just need a moment,” Donghyuck says. Taeil moves one hand away off the toilet tank, and places it over Hyuck’s arm, fingers gently rubbing encouragements, and it’s more than helpful.

When Hyuck starts to move it’s shallow, and after a few he begins pulling out more and more before sinking back in. He straightens his back again, so he can have better control of his thrusts, and as he sets a steady pace, he hopes that he remembers the angle correctly. Taeil’s pretty audible, he’s grunting, moaning. And once Hyuck hits the spot, he starts using his words too.

“Yes! Fuck! Right there, baby,” the words come out all breathy, and Hyuck remembers exactly what he’s doing and he keeps up in the same way. Taeil wraps a hand around himself, matching Hyuck’s rhythm, and they work in unison.

One chorus of swearwords and moans later, Hyuck feels his orgasm building up inside him. He tries to keep up the pace, but it’s starting to become more and more difficult.

“I’m close.”

“Come for me,” Taeil orders, and Hyuck loses it. He keeps trusting, frantic and shallow, and he feels Taeil clench. He lets go, burying himself inside as an involuntary moan rips from his throat. It’s like electricity is running through him, so he leans onto Taeil again, steadying himself as the waves of pleasure run through his body.

A few minutes after they come back to Earth Hyuck dares make a suggestion.

“We should do this again sometime.”

Taeil doesn’t respond in any way, he just smiles before kissing Donghyuck just as hungrily as he did before. Hyuck takes that as a yes.

* * *

The Saturday that follows is even more relaxing than the one before. Whatever remnants of tension he had in his body previously are now gone. Hyuck basically feels like an air dancer in front of an overpriced car dealership.

Hyuck goes back to his normal life of cleaning up and tying up loose ends from the entire week. But as it turns out, having Mark over for their usual pizza and FIFA isn’t the best decision that Hyuck has made, because of course Mark wants to talk about what happened just two nights prior. They’re in the middle of a game when Mark asks.

“How are you holding up?”

Donghyuck finds the phrasing of the question ever so slightly irritating. He’s not a hormonal teenager the day after he’s been dumped by his first boyfriend. He’s a grown man in his mid twenties that had a one night stand with the same guy twice. A two night stand, some would say. It’s nothing special. Millions of people do that.

He already knows how the conversation will unravel, the same way it did with Baekhyun just a week prior. But he decides to play it dumb for fun, trying to get Mark to do something he rarely does and actually say a bad word.

“What do you mean?”

“Twice, Hyuck. It happened twice,” Mark says, and he keeps his voice low, as if saying it in his normal volume would give something away. It’s just the two of them, why he’s doing that with any even remotely touchy subject Hyuck will never know.

“Thrice, Markie. It’s gonna happen thrice if it’s possible, cause that’s the best sex I’ve ever had,” he responds, enjoying as he watches Mark’s face grow more and more confused.

“You like having semi-public sex?”

“Semi-public? We’re so loud, it’s full on public.”

“That’s disgusting, you kinky fuck,” Mark scolds him.

Bingo.

“It’s not about it being public. It’s about him. He just takes me so well.”

Mark clicks pause on the game, then turns his entire body towards Hyuck.

“Hyuckie. It’s starting again,” he says with the most careful tone of voice.

“It’s not,” Hyuck rolls his eyes at him, “All I know about this dude is his name. Something happening twice is a coincidence. If I stumble onto him for a third time, then yeah, it’s fucking destiny, and I’m gonna get all up in my head about it. In the meantime, I’m fine.”

“Let’s hope you don’t see him for a third time.”

Donghyuck really wishes he does see him a third time, though. He knows exactly what he wants to do the third time around.

* * *

Just because Hyuck is in his twenties doesn’t mean that going out to drink just once a week doesn’t have an effect on his body. His liver is suffering, and frankly, so is he. He needs a night in, away from crowds and alcohol, and away from his friends and the back talk.

That’s why he stays at home on Friday, and he immerses himself in a video game. His thoughts aren’t as easy to control as the character in the game, and he thinks about Taeil, and what they did, and he wonders if staying at home is a good idea at all. But he needs the constant going out with the guys, he needs a break from them too. He loves them, but they get too much.

He’s two beers in and in the middle of getting killed in Halo when he receives a text from Ten that informs him that he’s an idiot. So Hyuck shuts his phone off, not allowing Ten to go on any further and explain himself. He’ll find out what he did tomorrow. Now, he just needs to clear his head and win at least one round.

Somewhere around two in the morning he gets under the shower. He needs to wash the anxiety off his skin, and he needs to get Taeil out of his head at the same time. Two birds with one stone.

* * *

It’s the noon the next day that Hyuck gets woken up by his doorbell going off. He’s not happy about it, but whoever is ringing it isn’t backing off, so he has to get up and get the door.

“You stupid little boy.”

Ten just barges into his apartment, no pleasantries exchanged. This must be a continuation of last night’s text chain that Hyuck hasn’t read yet.

“What did I do now?” Donghyuck asks, closing the door as Ten is already in the kitchen, unpacking whatever he has brought.

“You didn’t read your texts,” Ten tells him, then clears his throat and takes a dramatic pause before saying what he really came to say, “He was there.”

“Who was there?”

“Taeil.”

Donghyuck suddenly has all the questions in the world. He starts with the most important one.

“How do you know his name?”

Ten holds back from laughing at him.

“Cause he was there with his friends, like right next to us, and we talked to them,” he explains it like it’s obvious. Ten is making coffee because he has brought breakfast which he is also serving on Hyuck’s plates. Hyuck is watching Ten navigate his way through Hyuck’s space while straight up panicking at the same time.

“Why did you do that?”

“Because he asked about you Hyuckie,” Ten tells him, and he passes him a plate with a cinnamon roll, “And that is something that I promised Baek and Mark that I wasn’t going to tell you, so keep your mouth shut.”

Of course he’s not going to tell. He doesn’t care that it might get Ten in trouble, Ten can fend for himself. But telling, or talking about Taeil in any shape of form right now would get him in trouble, all the conversations about falling for people, and being careful will start again, which is the last thing he wants.

At this moment he’s just glad that at least one of his friends is on the same page as him.

“I knew that I was making a mistake by not going last night,” Hyuck admits. He thought about that all evening long, that’s the truth. He told himself that it’s just a case of anxiety, and there’s nothing more to it. He was wrong.

“Yeah well, tough shit now. But you’re going next Friday though, got it?”

It’s not a suggestion, that’s a straight order.

“Yes.”

“Cause third time’s the charm, and I exchanged numbers with one of his friend to make plans, so it’s definitely going to happen.”

Fuck. Hyuck has some preparing to do.

* * *

He goes all out. The apartment is spotless, much cleaner than the usual level of clean. He gets champaign and puts it in the fridge to chill. He gets chocolate covered strawberries from the bakery down the block, and flowers from the florist right next to the bakery. He also buys candles, an excessive amount of them and places them all around the bedroom to set the mood. All he’ll have to do is light them once they make their way to the apartment.

His hair is no longer blood orange, now it’s black, but Hyuck still recognizes him by that perky ass of his. Neither of them can contain their excitement and jitters. They’re at opposite sides of the club, still so far away, but they both have the widest smiles on their faces from the moment they spot each other.

Everyone around them is acting as if this is the most normal thing that’s ever happened. Including Mark, who never acts like anything around him is normal. He meets Taeil’s friends and Taeil kisses him as they say hello.

They stay at the club for maybe an hour or two. It’s Hyuck’s idea to leave.

“We both know what’s going to happen,” he says to Taeil. In return, Taeil is staring at Hyuck’s lips, ready to go in for a kiss immediately.

“Do we?”

“We sure do. But it can’t happen here. Come to mine. It’s time that I treat you the way you deserve.”

Taeil looks at him for a few moments, inspecting every inch on Hyuck’s face.

“I would never pass an offer like that,” he answers, finally.

“Never?”

“Not when it comes from you.

To say that Hyuck melts at that is an understatement.

* * *

Hyuck has him exactly where he wanted. Naked, lying on his back in his bed. There’s no rush, here, he can take his sweet time and make Taeil feel good.

They start with what Hyuck wanted to do from the moment his eyes landed on Taeil’s ass. He leaves a wet trail of kisses, licks and suctions that starts at Taeil’s neck and ends at his thighs. Hyuck only makes a stop when he reaches Taeil’s hips so he can suck in a hickey and mark him as his own. He asks for permission first, and Taeil nods frantically.

“I’m still gonna need your words, sweetheart,” Hyuck mocks with the words that are stuck in his head on repeat.

“Fuck yes,” Taeil’s words sound like hisses. Hyuck only feels prouder with every reaction he prompts from Taeil. He approaches the hickey with calm bites and suctions at first. He doesn’t want to go into it right away. It shouldn’t hurt, it’s supposed to feel good, that’s why he’s as careful as he can be.

It takes him a minute, but once he’s satisfied with the mark he leaves on Taeil’s left hip, and the sounds that are leaving Taeil’s mouth simply because he’s touching him, Hyuck starts kissing down his left thigh.

“Spread them for me, princess,” Hyuck orders. Taeil complies instantly, groaning at the new nickname Hyuck gives him.

Hyuck uses that moment to grab a pillow to put under Taeil’s ass, and Taeil raises his hips when he sees the pillow, without needing an explanation for it. Hyuck then shimmies down the mattress, getting in a comfortable position. He nudges Taeil’s knees up which prompts Taeil to follow the move, and he lifts them up until he can grab his ankles, giving Hyuck direct access.

He grazes his teeth along Taeil’s skin until he reaches his entrance. Then all he uses are his tongue and lips, leaving kisses, licking at it, breathing against it, slowly stretching him with his tongue before he introduces his fingers in the mix. He listens closely to Taeil’s breathing, the gasps and hitches tell him if what he’s doing is working or not.

He takes his time every step of the way, stretching Taeil included. He’s pacing himself from adding more fingers, the curses and the noises leaving Taeil’s mouth pure music to his ears. With three fingers inside, brushing against Taeil’s prostrate, Hyuck adds his pinky in for good measure. His other hand is stroking Taeil’s cock, he’s doing that without any rush too. Taeil has both hands into fists, squeezing Hyuck’s bed sheets.

“You’re driving me insane here, baby,” Taeil manages.

“I’m just trying to make it memorable.”

“You already have,” he responds, gulping, “I need you.”

“I got you.”

The only thing that Hyuck purposefully rushes within the entire exchange is putting on a condom and lubing himself up. He then towers over Taeil, propping himself up on one arm, while lining his cock up with his entrance. As he pushes in Taeil digs his nails into Hyuck’s back, and once he bottoms out Taeil wraps his legs around his waist, urging for the movement to begin.

Hyuck sets a steady pace at the beginning. It’s not as slow as he wanted it to be, but it’s Taeil who sets the speed for him, his heels digging into Hyuck’s skin whenever he wants him to speed up. The beauty about them being here, in Hyuck’s apartment, rather than another bathroom stall, is that they can be as loud as they want. Taeil uses that advantage fully, having seen by now the effect his vocalizations have on Donghyuck, he's loud every time Hyuck hits just the right spot.

“Harder,” Taeil pleads, voice shaky as he speaks. Hyuck slows down slightly as he begins pulling out more of his length and thrusting it in with more force. Taeil repeats the instruction a few more times until Hyuck is a mess of grunts and moans, pounding into him with all he has.

They come together, with Hyuck’s name ripping from Taeil’s throat.

There has never been a moment in Hyuck’s life when he felt prouder of himself than he does at this one.

* * *

Afterwards, they talk for what seems to be hours. They talk about everything besides the present, they talk anecdotes from when they were kids, and about school and family. Hyuck loses track of time, as they talk about nights out with friends and Hyuck swears that he’s never laughed so much in his life. They don’t talk about what’s between them, though. But there’s time for that in the morning, over breakfast. At least that’s what Hyuck expects.

  
  


In the morning Taeil is gone.

Donghyuck extends his arm over the place where he was sleeping and is unpleasantly jerked awake by the cold sheets. It was so nice last night. Why couldn’t time just stop and let him enjoy it a little longer?

Why did he leave before they exchanged numbers?

* * *

He’s now all in his head about it. That’s what Donghyuck does best, after all.

Every time he closes his eyes he sees Taeil’s face. His eyes, his smile, his voice, and his sounds.

He thinks about what a relationship with Taeil would be like. What it would be like if Taeil holds his hand, how he would tell him how he feels. Where their first date would be, what they would do for their first Valentine’s. He borderline starts planning their wedding.

Donghyuck gets so focused on it. The only thing left now is to actually make it come true.

* * *

When Friday comes and Taeil’s friends show up to the club, but he doesn’t Hyuck feels it like weight on his chest. Did he do something wrong? What’s going on? Why didn’t he show up?

“He said he’d be here, I don’t know why he isn’t,” Taeil’s friend Yuta tells him. Yuta and Mark have really hit it off, and with everyone there in some form of couple, Hyuck feels like a third wheel. Well, technically seventh, but still the same feeling.

He goes back to counting colors and pieces of clothing, taking a break every few seconds or so to check whether or not Taeil has showed up.

Taeil doesn’t show up at all that night. Hyuck feels a hole forming in his chest.

Shit. It really is happening again.

* * *

“Let’s go get dinner.”

It’s Baekhyun’s idea, and he means well, he does. There’s nothing wrong with the thought he has. But he still fucks up. It’s just how the stars are aligned this time around.

The restaurant Baekhyun picks is exactly where Taeil is. On what seems to be a date. With someone Hyuck has never seen before, but at the same time someone Hyuck can definitely see him with. He gets so jealous, and then he gets sad.

Taeil has his back turned to them as they enter, and he doesn’t see them. Cause Hyuck sees him right away and he gets out before Taeil can see any of them.

“So… Pizza?” Ten suggests.

“Pizza,” Baekhyun confirms, already walking away.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Hyuck tells them instead of an answer.

“No one’s asking you to talk about anything,” Mark tells him. His friends continue walking, unbothered by what they saw. But Hyuck knows, maybe not today, this will be talked about and dissected to the tiniest of details soon.

* * *

A couple of days later Ten does what seems to be his new thing and he shows up at Hyuck’s apartment completely uninvited.

“I come with gifts,” Ten announces.

“What?”

Ten is carrying an open cardboard box with him that he now places on Hyuck’s coffee table. He reaches in and pulls out a white and orange kitten.

“You’re turning into a cat lady, so I thought I’d get you started. His name is Moon.”

What brought him to this conclusion?

“I don’t need a cat,” Hyuck says, but it’s too late because Ten is placing the cat in Hyuck’s hands.

“You need someone to keep you company and rub the sadness of your lanky body. Cats are great at that.”

Ten is already walking towards the apartment door. This is all that he came for?

“I know nothing about cats.”

“Ask the internet.”

* * *

The cat’s a little shit. It doesn’t sleep. It scratches, and bites, and it pees directly on Hyuck. It’s like a mini Ten.

Hyuck shows up to work after two hours of sleep total, with bandages and scratches all over both arms, and he gets sent to Baekhyun’s office, cause his coworkers don’t believe when he says it’s cause of a cat. Jesus, how depressed do they think he is?

“What do you mean Ten got you a cat?” Baekhyun is just as surprised as Hyuck was the moment he received the gift.

“Ten got me a cat. It’s white and orange and it’s a boy, and he named him for me, so I’m already attached even though the cat is a fucking asshole,” Hyuck is on the verge of tears as he explains. He had barely any sleep, and that isn’t helping with how frustrated he feels with everything.

Baekhyun picks up his phone and calls Ten immediately, setting it on speakerphone for an impromptu conference call.

“You got Hyuck a cat?” Baekhyun asks.

“No, I didn’t.”

“Yes, you did,” Hyuck replies.

“And you already bitched about it?” Ten fakes disappointment, “Baek, take me off speakerphone.”

Baekhyun does exactly that. He eyes Hyuck from head to toe as he listens to his boyfriend explain.

“I told you to stay out of it,” that’s the only thing Baekhyun says, and then he listens to Ten ramble on. He concludes the conversation with, “Okay, great. I love you. See you later,” and he hangs up.

“Now do you believe me?”

“Yeah. Congratulations on the cat.”

Hyuck honestly thought he’d receive some form of help from Baekhyun. He’s such an idiot. Falling in love has made him an idiot.

“I don’t know what to do with it Baek. I had barely any sleep, he bites me every time I move, and he peed on me twice last night.”

“Ten said he’ll get someone to help you. He’ll even pay for the consultation.”

“What?”

Is this reality? An actual resolution?

“He knows some cat sitter, he’ll ask him to come help you adjust.”

After hearing that Hyuck feels a bit of a relief.

“Okay. Thanks.”

“I’ll get you some antibacterial cream,” Baekhyun tells him. Hyuck already picked up some at the pharmacy this morning.

“Sure, I could use another tube of that.”

* * *

Ten arranges for Hyuck to take the cat to the cat sitter’s and basically have a play date with their cat the next day. How is that going to help him, he’s unsure, but he’ll take any help he can get. Cause he’s never getting rid of that little asshole that peed on him the first night and eats his fingers every time he tries to pet him, or moves them in any way.

He arrives at the stranger’s apartment with the cat in a blue cat carrier that he bought just hours prior, as well as a brand new Batman band-aid on his hand cause the munchkin didn’t want to get inside and he screamed during the entire ride over. He rings the door phone in front of the building entrance, and waits for an answer. The cat is still screaming, and the people who are walking by are giving him strange looks. So far he’s enjoying this experience a whole lot.

“Hello?”

“Hi. I’m here for…” Wait, what was the cat sitter’s name? Did Ten even tell him?

“I can hear the cat. Come on up,” the stranger says, and buzzes him in.

If he’s being honest, he should’ve known that Ten was up to something from the moment he showed up in his apartment with a cat. In a way, he did, it was pretty obvious, but what he thought that Ten was up to wasn’t exactly correct. And that was Hyuck’s mistake. He should’ve stayed on his toes, instead of assuming Ten just wanted to make cat lady jokes. He assumed Ten was setting him up for that line of mockery, but was also desperate enough for a companion that he didn’t really care.

But now he knows. Now he gets it. Cause the moment he gets to the floor he recognizes the stranger that’s waiting for him. It’s the guy with whom Taeil was on that date.

Shit. Does Ten know? He must have, he knows everything. The fuck was Ten thinking? He’s gonna yell at him so much the next time he sees him that Ten will never want to see him again.

In the meantime, he needs to play nice.

“Hi.”

“Hi. Come on in.”

“I’m sorry for his screaming.”

“It’s okay. I’m used to that by now,” the stranger smiles at him, stepping back to let Hyuck into the apartment, “I’m Jungwoo. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Donghyuck, it’s nice to meet you too.”

“Take a seat. He’s running a little late, so he asked me to come and greet you. The little ones really hate it when they’re not in their own home, so it’s best to have them inside quickly in situations like this one.”

Hyuck sits down on the couch, and he leaves the cat carrier on the floor next to his feet. The cat is no longer screaming constantly, but Hyuck can tell that the little one is still in distress. Hyuck can’t wait to get this over with so he can take the cat back home, back to safety.

“Yeah, I noticed,” Hyuck says, then he switches the subject to the question he has in hand, “I thought you were the cat sitter.”

“No, I’m just the boyfriend. Taeil’s gonna be here in a few minutes,” Jungwoo tells him. Holy fucking shit, “Can I offer you something to drink? I think he has tea here somewhere.”

Hyuck’s mouth goes dry, but he’s too uncomfortable to ask, even though Jungwoo offers.

“I’m fine, thank you.”

Jungwoo offers him a smile.

“So how did you get the little guy?”

Right. A conversation. That’s what playing nice consists of.

“It was a gift from a friend. He gave it to me unexpectedly, and he was the one that named him, also. Ten set this up as well. He just kind of does whatever he wants,” Hyuck smiles politely, signaling the humor in it, and Jungwoo smiles along.

“What’s the cat’s name?”

“It’s Moon.”

“That’s funny. Taeil’s family name is Moon,” the guys says and chuckles.

Fucking Ten.

“I didn’t know that.”

“That’s alright. I’m sure he’s gonna find it hilarious.”

Um… yeah. Hyuck isn’t too sure about that. He’s pretty sure that Ten did all of this on purpose. And probably with someone’s help. Not Mark’s, or Baek’s. Most likely one of Taeil’s friends. Not Taeyong. Johnny or Yuta. From what he’s gotten to know them, it sounds more like a Johnny move.

Still. Just, fucking why?

At the sound of a key turning Hyuck tenses up even more. He’s here. Shit. Shit.

“Hi,” Taeil greets absentmindedly. He still has to turn around and see who’s in his apartment, “I’m sorry I’m late.”

“I think we managed,” Jungwoo says with a smile, “This is Donghyuck, he’s your appointment. You’re never gonna guess the name of the cat. Donghyuck, this is Taeil, he’s gonna help you.”

Both of them stand frozen, and Hyuck doesn’t know what to say to break the ice. Luckily, Taeil does it for him.

“It’s nice to meet you.”

Oh. That’s how they’re playing this?

“It’s nice to meet you too.”

“I’ll leave you guys to it.”

They’re both still frozen and silent for maybe a minute after Jungwoo leaves. They’re staring at each other, and Hyuck feels the hole in his chest, the one he developed back when he saw Taeil on a date, grow bigger with each passing moment. It wasn’t supposed to be like this again. He wasn’t supposed to fall in love again with someone who will never reciprocate his feelings.

“I’m sorry,” Hyuck says, “I didn’t know. This was all Ten, I swear I didn’t know.”

“It wasn’t just Ten, it was Johnny too. He arranged this with me.”

Well, at least Hyuck’s hunch was correct.

“Oh,” he nods a few times, panicking. He needs to get away from here, “I’m sorry. I’m gonna go.”

“Hyuckie…”

“Don’t. I’m already in my head enough about you. I can’t. I’m sorry. Your boyfriend seems so nice, and if I stay here for another moment, I might ruin it for both of us.”

“He’s not my boyfriend. Did he say that? He’s my oldest friends, and he confessed his feelings for me recently, but I… we’re not. I’m trying to figure it out, but it’s not a relationship,” Taeil explains, and Hyuck hangs onto each and every word. He’s hopeful about this working out, he’s going to be for a while.

There’s a burning question on Hyuck’s lips.

“When did he confess? Before, or after we…”

“After.”

“So why did you leave in the middle of the night.”

Taeil looks at the ground. Hyuck has a bad feeling about this.

“Cause I got scared. It was so intense, and I just… I panicked.”

“I see.”

“I need to figure it out. Just let me help you with the cat in the meantime. Let’s start from there. Cause if you leave right now, I won’t be able to take it.”

If Hyuck leaves right now, he wouldn’t be able to take it either. Every fiber of his being demands that he stays.

“Okay.”

“So, what’s the cat’s name?”

“Moon. Ten named him.”

“Ah, I’m pretty sure Johnny did.”

* * *

Taeil is extremely helpful when it comes to the cat. He answers all of Hyuck’s questions, and by the end of the two hours Hyuck spends in his apartment Hyuck has a good idea about what he’s doing. He learns the key points, fresh food and water always being available for the kitty, lots of toys to keep him exchanged, a window that he can look through to satisfy his curiosity, and the most important one of all, allow the cat to show you what it needs. It doesn’t stop him from feeling exiguous though.

They exchange numbers, finally, and Taeil tells him that he should call or text whenever he has an issue with the cat. Hyuck files that somewhere in the back of his mind, cause he’s not actually going to do it. He now see what Taeil’s got. What he could never offer him. He knows that Taeil’s going to figure it out, and it’s not going to be him. How can he compete with a lifelong friend. That’s like trying to compare how close he is with Ten, who he’s known for two years, compared to Mark, who he’s known since they were in kindergarten. He’s always gonna pick Mark over Ten. If they were in a burning building, and he could only pull one of them out, of course he’s going to choose Mark. And that’s why, he knows that Taeil won’t pick him.

It’s that same night when he finally makes some connection with the cat, outside of getting peed on. Out of all the places in the apartment, and all the cat beds Ten brought, the cat chooses to share a bed with Donghyuck.

“It’s just us now, bud. Us against the world,” he says to the cat, and the cat licks his finger in response. He doesn’t bite him that night, at all.

  
  


The biggest breakthrough that he makes with the cat is that the cat learns to read his emotions. Moon minds his own business most of the time, but the moment Hyuck starts thinking about Taeil, and how they’ll never be together, he gets sad. And whenever he gets sad Moon makes his way to him and demands attention so much that Hyuck can’t help but give it to him, and it doesn’t stop until he feels much better.

What Hyuck got with Moon was basically an emotional support animal. A slightly feral one, though. But they’re gonna work on that, together.

* * *

Mark and Ten make their way to Hyuck’s apartment. Ten seems to have taken Mark under his wing, because it’s Mark that announces it when they walk in.

“We’re going out.”

“I can’t.”

He’s having a very cozy night inside with a little kitten sleeping right next to him.

“Hyuck,” Ten warns.

“I don’t want to see Taeil again.”

“But I want him to see you, to see what he’s missing,” Ten explains. Of course this is Ten’s idea, and right there is the confirmation.

“What he’s missing is a depressed mess, so he’s not actually missing anything.”

“Stop putting yourself down, bro,” Mark tells him.

“You know damn well what will happen in the end. So get up, and get dressed.”

“Ten!”

“Mark and I will put you in clothes if we have to. I actually did something for you, and you need to respect it and be grateful.”

“Stop doing things for me, you’re not helping.”

“Yes I am.”

“Hyuck, please. I can’t listen to you two argue anymore, I need a break. Just do what he says, and we’ll both get some peace from him.”

Luckily for Ten, Hyuck can rarely say no to Mark when he uses that tone of voice.

* * *

When they arrive at the club Taeil and his friends are already there. So is Jungwoo, and so, Hyuck’s stomach turns. He puts on a front from the moment he steps in.

It’s calm at first. Despite the huge elephant in the room it’s a pleasant night. But after a while, things get obvious, and it starts to look like it’s not just Hyuck, Jungwoo isn’t at ease either. It looks like he’s caught onto them, onto the stares from everyone, onto the tension. Onto Taeil edging closer and closer to Hyuck all night long.

And then Jungwoo realizes that Hyuck is more than Johnny’s friend’s friend. He connects some dots. So he storms off. And Taeil follows him.

That is how Hyuck’s heart breaks again. He downs his drink and he leaves, taking advantage of Mark's bathroom visit to walk away without anyone stopping him or tagging along. He doesn’t say anything to anyone.

He needs to be alone. He needs to process this.

* * *

He calls in sick. He’s ready to keep up the charade for days, to lounge around the apartment and ignore the world around him. He’s feeling sorry for himself and it’s weirdly therapeutic, crying out all the negative emotions he has pent up inside is quite helpful. But two days in, as his group of friends lets themselves into his apartment, he remembers that he gave Mark a backup key, and he regrets that decision immediately.

“You’re coming with us,” Baekhyun tells him.

“The last time I did that is the exact reason why I’m doing this right now.”

“Don’t be a baby. We’re gonna go to the movies, and then we’re gonna go get coffee. Just the four of us. Does that work for you?”

It doesn’t. He doesn’t want to do it. He needs to come up with an excuse quickly.

“I can’t leave the cat alone.”

“I know a cat sitter,” Ten pipes up.

“You shut up. You helped enough. We’re doing this my way now.”

Jesus. These two are fighting now? They never fight. And Mark is just quietly watching which means Baekhyun probably gave him a talking to also.

“Fine,” Ten agrees.

“The cat can go four hours without you. Just get the fuck up. And go take a shower, for god’s sake.”

Between a rock and a hard place. Hyuck doesn’t have a choice but to agree. Again.

* * *

Baekhyun’s way of ‘just the four of us’ also includes two of Taeil’s friends that join them for coffee. That’s why Hyuck decides that no one can be trusted anymore, and he tries to leave, but Mark doesn’t let him.

“Just hear them out.”

They break the ice by ordering their drinks and Ten and Mark making small talk with the boys.

“So we hear you’re depressed because of Taeil,” Johnny says, only to immediately be smacked in the arm by Taeyong.

“Don’t say it like that.”

“It’s true though,” Mark responds. It’s probably the first thing Hyuck has heard him say all night long.

“And I hear you two scheme together,” Hyuck says, pointing at Ten and then at Johnny.

“Yeah. Sorry about that. I just thought that he’d come to his senses when he sees you,” Johnny responds.

“What do you mean?”

“We like Jungwoo, don’t get us wrong,” Taeyong’s preface has Hyuck wanting to roll his eyes, “He’s a good kid. It’s just that Taeil doesn’t see him that way, but he’d also do everything he can not to lose him.”

“How about you start from the beginning?” Baekhyun suggests.

“Okay. So like, their moms were childhood friends, and they were kind of meant to be friends too. Then Jungwoo’s mom passed away, and Taeil just kind of became his older brother. They’re basically inseparable,” Taeyong says. So far, so lukewarm. Sounds like he has nothing to worry about.

“Taeil hasn’t dated anyone in a couple of years and he acts like he doesn’t have the time for it, which is not true. He hooked up here and there, but it was never more than that. And it never happened more than once with the same person,” Johnny adds onto the explanation, listing more things that Hyuck needs to think about, “He just doesn’t want to have to pick between love and Jungwoo. And then you came along, and he was really interested. He still is. And he talks about you a lot. But Jungwoo gets jealous, like always.”

“We can’t like prove anything. But we also can’t be certain he has actual feelings for Taeil, or if he’s just saying things. It’s not the first time this happened. Taeil tends to give in, cause they’ve known each other for so long,” Taeyong seems to be picking his words more carefully, but no matter how anyone puts it, it’s not easy for Hyuck to deal with any of it.

“And what makes any of you think that he won’t give in again?” Hyuck asks. He looks at all the people around him, expecting a solid answer. What he receives is just reasons for hope.

“Cause it’s different this time around. I know it seems like what you two have is mostly physical and barely anything, but you’re not just anyone to him. Especially not after you took him home, romanced him up and stayed up talking to him for hours. He was taken aback when you did that for him. No one else has,” Johnny states, quite confident with his words.

Everyone at the table looks at him, expecting for him to say anything. His friends aren’t surprised by anything that’s been said, they probably knew really well how the story goes, even before they brought him here. He appreciates it, knowing the truth. But he hates it at the same time.

“Thank you all for bringing my hopes up. I was just starting to feel better. This was the opposite of helpful.”

“I’m really sorry. But you need to know the truth. Cause if you give up on him, he’s never gonna break the cycle,” Taeyong tells him.

“I really appreciate you sharing this with me. But if I don’t give up on him, I’ll just stay stuck in mine.”

* * *

He manages to get back to work a couple of days later. He needs it really, as fun as hanging out with Moon can be, he’s a cat, and cats love to sleep, and in those moments, Hyuck lacks distractions. So he tries to go back to some form of normal life.

Work keeps him busy. He asks Baekhyun to give him an additional project, just so he’d have more work to do, and with that, he’d have work to take at home. That’s all he can do to help himself with this. Focus on work completely. Cause when he focuses on work, his thoughts don’t get jumbled up with nonsense and feelings.

Hyuck manages, that’s how he survives through the entire thing. He leans on his friends for support, and he goes into survival mode, the way he always does. At least this time it’s a bit easier, because he has Moon who depends on him, and Hyuck has a sense of being needed and wanted because of the cat.

At the end of the day it all boils down to the same thing. The hell was he thinking? It’s never different. Why did he let himself believe it would be different this time?

* * *

He chooses not to go out anymore. He does everything he can to avoid Taeil. That doesn’t mean that Taeil wants to avoid him, though.

It’s a quiet night at home for Hyuck when Taeil shows up at his apartment, looking defeated. As soon as he looks at him Hyuck looses all ability to think straight.

“What are you doing here?”

“I need you to fuck me until I can’t think or feel anything except you.”

Hyuck considers it, he considers the aftermath of each decision, and either answer brings him to the same thing. If he says no he’ll regret it for not taking the chance. If he says yes he’ll regret it because he’ll fall in love even more. So Hyuck catches him by the hand and pulls him towards the inside of the apartment. But after that it’s Taeil that takes the lead, taking note of the kitten jumping around the living room, he guides Hyuck to the bedroom.

He pushes him on the bed, then he climbs on top, going straight for his mouth. Besides a trail of kisses that travel from Hyuck’s neck and down his torso after Taeil pulls off his shirt, there’s barely any foreplay. Taeil is rushing, he’s coming of desperate, and Hyuck isn’t interested in stopping him. Whatever Taeil wants, that’s what he’s going to do.

Taeil undresses him, quickly, and Hyuck follows every move, raising his hips in compliance to make things easier for him. He then moves onto undressing himself, doing it even quicker, and Hyuck is propped up on his elbows, watching carefully. He can’t look away and it’s all he needs.

“There’s lube and condoms in the drawer,” Hyuck tells him, pointing towards his nightstand. Taeil reaches over and pulls out everything they need. He passes the condom to Hyuck, and he uses the time while Hyuck rolls it on to apply some lube at his entrance. He spreads whatever is leftover on his fingers over Hyuck’s length, then he straddles him and lines up, “Taeil…” Hyuck tries to warn.

“I’m ready,” Taeil lets him know and he starts sinking down on him. It’s a tight fit, but Taeil’s not showing any signs of discomfort, and he keeps going down. It’s tight, and warm, and everything about this moment is really hot.

“Fuck, baby. You’re so tight,” Hyuck cries out, hands landing on Taeil’s hips in attempt to steady his own feelings.

Taeil starts moving soon, gasping every time he’s seated onto Hyuck’s lap. His back arches as he starts hitting his prostate and he falls forward, relying on Hyuck for some balance. He sets a rhythm, and Hyuck lets go of any restraints he has put on himself. He lies back, allows the pleasure to wash over his body.

“I need…” Taeil’s words trail off as he sinks back down on Hyuck’s cock.

“What do you need, princess?”

“Give me a hickey,” he finally says, words separated by heavy breaths.

“Another one?”

“That one’s fading, I can’t see it anymore.”

Hyuck moves his hand slightly, so he can look down at the exact spot on Taeil’s hips. He’s right, it is fading. It makes Hyuck think, though, if that’s why Taeil showed up out of nowhere. Is it connected to that mark. Was he afraid he was going to forget?

Hyuck picks a different spot, this time he goes for Taeil’s chest, and he’s much less gentle, wanting it to stay on Taeil’s skin for longer. Taeil moans at the sensation, and he starts to lose his rhythm too, as his breathing quickens.

He’s close, and he can tell that Taeil is too because of his breathing, remaining shallow and loud after the fact, so he reaches over to wrap a hand around him. Taeil pushes it away, grabs it, and takes his other one too. He joins them together, fingers tight around Hyuck’s wrists, placing them on his stomach, and he continues to ride him for a few more minutes.

Taeil comes untouched and Hyuck follows a second later. He lets go of Hyuck’s hands and falls forward again, right into the sticky mess of come and sweat. Hyuck quickly wraps his arms around Taeil, and he realizes how well he fits there. He fits there perfectly, it’s exactly where he belongs.

  
  


Hyuck is half asleep with his head on Taeil’s shoulder when he mumbles out the only question out of his million that he dares to ask.

“What are we?”

It’s silent for a moment, and Hyuck feels himself falling in deeper sleep. He’s not expecting an answer. He’s not expecting the answer he receives either.

“We’re in love.”

* * *

In the morning Taeil is gone again, and Hyuck feels like he’s losing his damn mind. Did he hallucinate what Taeil said? He suspected that this would happen. But he’s still disappointed because he doesn’t know what exactly Taeil wants.

He wishes he knew the answer to that question. He wishes he didn’t fall asleep.

He wishes the morning never came, and Taeil never woke up and left.

* * *

When Friday comes, Hyuck picks himself up to go out with the guys. He lets Taeil’s declaration, Taeyong’s words and the hope that they ignite, persuade him into doing it. He can’t let out of sight, out of mind happen, he can’t slow down now.

But just as he is ready to leave, he realizes that Moon is nowhere to be found. He looks around the apartment only to conclude that he’s not there. Calling after him doesn’t achieve anything. So he calls the guys for help.

Mark helps him look, while Baek and Ten do things separately. They look up and down the apartment building, covering every inch, but they can’t find the cat.

Donghyuck isn’t handling it well. Moon is the only thing he has leftover from Taeil, a constant that he knows is gonna be there, but now even that is gone.

They’re looking for more than an hour, covering every inch with cat treats in hand, knocking on his neighbor’s doors to ask if anyone has seen him. Hyuck covers every inch of the building as many times as he can. The cat is nowhere to be found.

“Hyuck, he’s here!” he hears Ten’s voice and he rushes upstairs, only to realize that Ten isn’t the one that has found him. It’s Taeil. And Moon is comfortably lying on his arm, purring at the scratches he’s receiving. Seeing Moon safe feels like all the weight of the world has been lifted.

“How did you know he was here?”

“When I panicked the other night, I came here to clear my head. I realized that there’s a lot of birds on the roof. I thought I’d check,” Taeil tells him. The cat seems so comfortable in Taeil’s arms, exactly as comfortable as Hyuck feels there.

“We passed by here like so many times,” Ten says.

“If you were calling after him you might’ve scared him. Cats don’t like loud and unknown noises.”

“Thank you,” Hyuck says. He tries to swallow all the things he wants to say and ask, but once thing still escapes his lips, “You didn’t have to come.”

“I did. Taeyong told me what happened, and I just had to.”

Hyuck wishes Ten would break his silence and end this tension that’s building between them. Instead, Ten is unhelpful here. He looks at them, eyes darting from one to the other, and as the silence builds to what seems like a crescendo he clears his throat and says.

“I’ll take Moon back to the apartment and let you guys talk.”

Taeil hands the cat to Ten, and waits until Ten has climbed down the first flight of stairs to ask.

“How have you been?”

“Okay. You?”

“I’m okay too,” he seconds it with a nod that only increases the level of awkward, “Would you have come to the club tonight, if it wasn’t for this?”

“Yeah, I would have. Why?”

“I wanted to tell you something,” Taeil states with shaky voice. Hyuck doesn’t respond in any way, he has a feeling that he knows what will be said, so instead he waits for him to continue, “I can never repay you for how you make me feel.”

“Taeil,” Hyuck attempts to stop him before he goes too far, but he fails.

“And I shouldn’t do this to you anymore. I shouldn’t string you along. You deserve so much better than me.”

“I don’t want to hear this,” he responds with the only thought that keeps repeating in his mind.

“Hyuck.”

It’s now or never in Hyuck’s mind. He needs the truth. He needs to confront him before his feelings and fantasies go too far, and he stops being able to look back.

“I talked to Taeyong and Johnny. They’re under the impression that you’re stuck in a cycle of giving up. I don’t want to meddle in any of your relationships, or in any friendships. I just want to know one thing. What do you want to do? Not what you should do, or what you think is right. Don’t think about it too much. What do you want?”

“You.”

There isn’t a single second of silence between Hyuck’s question and Taeil’s answer. Taeil looks like he’s defeated at first, but the confession makes Hyuck smile, so he smiles back.

“It’s as simple as that.”

“Can you give me a week?”

“I can give you all the time you need.”

* * *

Hyuck goes back to a semi-normal life from that point on. He occupies his time with work, and with Moon, and when he gets dragged out by the guys to hang out somewhere, and often with Taeil’s friends too, he goes back to counting colors and sweaters and all that jazz. He only goes so he doesn’t think too much about what’s going to happen in the end.

He doesn’t hear from Taeil for more than a week. He checks his phone way too much, but there are no signs of him, no calls and no texts. He hears from Taeil’s friends that he went back to his hometown, and that Jungwoo went back with him. That’s all he knows for about two weeks.

* * *

“Just roll the dice,” Baekhyun says to Mark, his voice filled with mockery.

“I know you two are cheating. I’m gonna prove it one of these days,” Mark responds.

“Jesus, you two calm down,” Ten offers without looking up, his eyes focused on making sure the money in the bank is in neat little piles, after he accidentally messed them up a moment earlier.

“This is exactly why playing board games with you two is a nightmare,” Donghyuck says. He’s on Mark’s side with this, they always seem to be winning, no matter what game they’re playing. Cheating is the only answer as to why that happens.

“You’re lucky we still hang out with you,” Baekhyun retorts. Maybe playing any game with this group of three highly competitive characters isn’t Hyuck’s greatest decision, but the tone in Baekhyun’s voice is absolutely uncalled for.

“No one’s forcing you. I’d actually much prefer it if you left.”

“Why? So you can make space for another cat?”

“You’re the one who bought me the cat.”

“And you haven’t said thank you,” Ten mocks.

Hyuck is just about to get in the heat of the argument. That’s when the buzzer goes off.

He gets off the floor and rushes towards the intercom to answer.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me.”

He freezes for a second when he recognizes the voice. Then he immediately pushes on the button that unlocks the front door.

“That’s Taeil. All of you shut up right now.”

As soon as he says that he practically runs towards the front door and exits the apartment, careful so Moon wouldn’t escape again. While he waits for Taeil to climb up the stairs he can feel his heartbeat in his throat. He’s nervous. He has no idea what Taeil’s going to say. He can only hope for good news.

“Hi,” Taeil greets him, smiling from ear to ear. He’s still climbing up the stairs, but he greets him the moment he sees him.

“Hey.”

“I know it’s been two weeks. I’m sorry. I tried calling and texting, but apparently, when you’re on top of a mountain, you can’t exactly get a signal.”

“What were you doing on top of a mountain?”

“I went to fix a friendship and set some boundaries.”

“I see,” Hyuck whispers the words, allowing the smile on his face to grow wider.

“Hi,” Taeil says again when he finally reaches the top of the stairs, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

“Are you free tomorrow night?”

“Yes. What do you have in mind?”

“I’d like to take you out on a date.”

“Sounds great.”

“I’ll text you the details. I have signal now.”

“Alright,” Hyuck nods and smiles again.

“I have to go home and wash the bus ride off me.”

“I’d invite you to shower here, but I have guests. We’re playing monopoly, Baek and Ten are cheating.”

“Sounds fun.”

“You’ll have to join us next time.”

“I will. See you tomorrow,” Taeil says before he leans in and leaves a peck on Hyuck’s lips.

  
  


Hyuck is dancing his way into the apartment, with the widest smile he’s sported in a while. That behavior prompts curious stares, and it also prompts Mark to ask.

“What happened?”

“I have a date tomorrow night,” Hyuck says, beaming.

“Congratulations!”

“See? All you had to do was trust me.”

“Stop making everything about yourself, Ten,” Hyuck returns as he takes his seat next to the monopoly board, “And stop cheating.”

* * *

It’s a nice restaurant, and Hyuck feels ever so slightly under dressed. But only for a minute, cause Taeil compliments him, and as soon as he hears Taeil say that he looks nice in his outfit he forgets all about it.

That’s the same night, when he’s wined and dined, and Taeil has his fingers intertwined around his, Hyuck stops feeling pathetic.

  
  


In the morning, he wakes up in Taeil’s arms. It’s only then that all of his fears disappear, that he knows for sure that Taeil’s here to stay.

Taeil stays. Always. Without a single exception.

**Author's Note:**

> [me @ myself the entire time i was editing.](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/e3/70/6b/e3706b954720a254b950a21dea759d2e.png) and i still kept it.
> 
> thanks for reading. please let me know what you thought of it.  
> stay safe!! stream punch!!
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/newct127)   
>  [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.qa/newct127)


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